This is not ok, cupid.

Today’s message is brought to you by the character “tilde”.

He’s approximately over 40 (I’m not sure how this works, but his profile says he’s 46, so I guess that’s “approximately” above 40), approximately 6’ (5’10” on his profile), and approximately 230lbs (due to the lack of picture, I’m sure we can assume it’s about 250).

How couldn’t I be interested?

At your age, I’m pretty sure the only shots I’d be giving you are your cortisone injections for your arthritis.

And I’m back.

I have no words. You win, internet.

It’s been a few days since I have received any creepy messages, but at least this one makes up for lost time.