This is not ok, cupid.

Aug 22

First of all, never write a poem to a girl as your first message.
Secondly, never start that poem with the term “evening stroke”.

First of all, never write a poem to a girl as your first message.

Secondly, never start that poem with the term “evening stroke”.

Aug 06

This message was sent approximately a month and a half ago. A little creepy, but it was kept short, so congratuwelldone on that.

However, I then received this message about a week ago.


Still keeping it short, still keeping it boring, and still hasn’t learned that if you just press that key once, it ends the sentence.

Jul 25

Today’s entry comes to us from a girl named Katie.
I find the wording of this message to be very vague. Does he want her to watch him take his clothes off, then also watch him dildo his ass while he masturbates, or is she supposed to masturbate while watching this? Or do I have this all wrong, and is she supposed to dildo his ass while he masturbates? Then again, does it really matter? I feel like if Katie ever wants to come out of her shell, she might just take a public speaking class instead of ever responding to this message.

Today’s entry comes to us from a girl named Katie.

I find the wording of this message to be very vague. Does he want her to watch him take his clothes off, then also watch him dildo his ass while he masturbates, or is she supposed to masturbate while watching this? Or do I have this all wrong, and is she supposed to dildo his ass while he masturbates? Then again, does it really matter? I feel like if Katie ever wants to come out of her shell, she might just take a public speaking class instead of ever responding to this message.

Jul 04

My favourite part of this is “you’re too stressed and stop taking care of yourself”. I forgot that stress and shampoo usage are inversely proportional to one another.

My favourite part of this is “you’re too stressed and stop taking care of yourself”. I forgot that stress and shampoo usage are inversely proportional to one another.

Jun 27

Today’s message is brought to you by the character “tilde”.
He’s approximately over 40 (I’m not sure how this works, but his profile says he’s 46, so I guess that’s “approximately” above 40), approximately 6’ (5’10” on his profile), and approximately 230lbs (due to the lack of picture, I’m sure we can assume it’s about 250).
How couldn’t I be interested?

Today’s message is brought to you by the character “tilde”.

He’s approximately over 40 (I’m not sure how this works, but his profile says he’s 46, so I guess that’s “approximately” above 40), approximately 6’ (5’10” on his profile), and approximately 230lbs (due to the lack of picture, I’m sure we can assume it’s about 250).

How couldn’t I be interested?